> *EDIT*: I am putting a bounty on this question. Therefore I added references and precisions to address the comments (some of which, I > believe, seem to have been posted without reading this question). This _may_ seem like a question that was answered [here](https://islam.stackexchange.com/questions/22887/what-are-the-rights-of-un-married-girls-to-choose-husband-in-islam/22890#22890) , or [here](https://islam.stackexchange.com/questions/12042/is-forced-marriage-to-a-religious-man-allowed/12086#12086) , or [here](https://islam.stackexchange.com/questions/29816/forcefully-married) (links from this site). But I looked everywhere, and no, none of these, or any other sites I found, would answer my question. All answers, all hadiths, all sources say that the consent of the girl is mandatory for the marriage to be valid **and** that her silence is a mark of agreement. As treated in [this question](https://islam.stackexchange.com/questions/22982/does-islam-support-pedophilia-or-child-marriages/23473#23473) , marriage with an infant girl, no matter how young, is allowed. (Yes, I am aware that **sexual penetration** is not permitted - see question 2, below). I am talking solely about the **marriage contract**. That is also confirmed [here](https://islamqa.info/en/146882) , with more than ample references and links to other sources. I cite here some of that link: > Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said in al-Sharh > al-Kabeer, 7/386: > > With regard to females, the father **may give** his minor, virgin daughter > who has not yet reached the age of nine in marriage, and there is **no > difference of opinion** concerning that, if he gives her in marriage to > someone who is compatible. Ibn al-Mundhir said: **All of those scholars** > from whom we acquired knowledge **unanimously agreed** that it is > permissible for a father to give his minor daughter in marriage if he > arranges her to someone who is compatible, and it is permissible for > him to do that even **if she is reluctant**. End quote. Now, to be clear: yes, a girl who is old enough to understand the situation must be asked, and if she says no, the marriage cannot occur as it would be forced and therefore invalid (since her consent is mandatory). All the sources and references I looked up agreed on that. The marriage of an infant, however, can be decided by her father because her father has the right to make that decision in her stead, much like he can manage her money in her stead, until she comes of age. So the marriage of an infant is allowed, but sexual penetration should be postponed "until she is physically able to bear intercourse"-quote from link above. One should insist, at this point, that "physically able to bear intercourse" does **not** mean "puberty", since intercourse with prepubescent girls *is* allowed (see all exegeses of [this verse](http://www.altafsir.com/Tafasir.asp?tMadhNo=0&tTafsirNo=73&tSoraNo=65&tAyahNo=4&tDisplay=yes&UserProfile=0&LanguageId=2)) . It simply means what it says: able to bear penetration. Getting back to the marriage **contract**, which is the main point of this question: if the girl is too young to protest, since she could not have possibly given her consent and remained "silent", she would grow up into a relationship and a situation that she did not choose. And even if sexual intercourse is postponed, she would eventually be subject to it. How can that marriage *not* be considered *forced* ? That was the main question of this thread. However, if you have answers, *and sources*, to the following additional questions, I would be very grateful. I looked for a some years now, I read all the books I could find in three languages, and I did not find what I was looking for. 1. If a girl that was married when she was 6 months old grows up and reaches puberty, can she un-marry on the grounds that she did not give her consent when she was a baby? I know that in Islam, a girl cannot divorce, only the man can, but I know she *can* make her case to a judge and in some cases the judge can side with her if the husband is unsuitable. But let us suppose her husband is very kind, very religious, very faithful, can provide for her and generally satisfies absolutely all conditions for a good husband. Can a judge allow the divorce *solely* on the basis that she did not give her consent? Did this ever happen? 2. As said above, sexual penetration is *specifically* only allowed when "she is physically able to bear intercourse", but are other forms of sexual pleasure allowed ? This is crude, I know, but there should be no "haya'" (shyness, حياء) in religion, and I have no way of making myself understood otherwise: For example, can a man masturbate with her hands or thighs? can he kiss her like he would kiss a grown woman? Can he touch her? Those are pleasures that "her body can bear". The only Hadiths I could find mentioned penetration, not other, one would say "non intrusive", forms of pleasures. I know Khomeini says so in his Tahrirolvasyleh, but he offers no sources, only he opinion, and that is not enough. On the other hand, the other sources I could find clearly talk about intercourse (when they say the man should wait). They do not, however, forbid such things as foreplay, kissing, and other forms of non-penetrating pleasures. I am looking for such references. 3. If the answer is no, then I have a follow up question. As I understand it, marriage in Islam has two main justifications: The first is to provide a legal frame into which a family can be built - kids brought up, etc. The second justification is to provide a legal frame into which sex can be had (to avoid fornication). Marriage to a child does not satisfy the first justification -since the girl is unable to have kids before puberty - but *could* satisfy the second justification. However, if the answer to question 2 is no, if even the second justification is out of the picture, what is the wisdom of marrying a child? Finally, and this is important, please understand that this is **not** a question about the marriage of the prophet with Aicha. All questions asked on that matter were answered time and time again. Please only restrict the answers to *general* Islamic rules that apply to everyone. Also, a gentle reminder: We agree that forced marriage is forbidden. If you know anyone who can answer, please do let them know. Second EDIT: I just would like to add that this is not a question about paedophilia in Islam (for which ample discussion has been had [here](https://islam.stackexchange.com/questions/22982/does-islam-support-pedophilia-or-child-marriages?lq=1)) . Please do not debate the "different cultural perceptions of readiness and maturity for sexual relations", it would be besides the point. I am sorry for being firm on this, but it is a question that haunts me since I found out about this subject and I would be saddened if the discussion goes astray. Third EDIT: It has been brought to my attention that question 1, above, is not clear regarding what I meant by "a woman cannot get a divorce, a man can". What I meant was "cannot get *automatically*" a divorce, unlike the man who decides alone if he wants to divorce, a woman's initiating of a divorce is known as خلع or (khul'a) and is not the same thing as a divorce (in that her saying "I divorce you" is not enough). Although this misunderstanding is not critical to the overall question, I needed to add it to avoid having the discussion go astray.

What is the opinion of the 4 madhab regarding the father marrying his prepubescent son without his consent? I read online on this site that all four madhab agree that the father has the right to wed his young son without his consent, however no sources were mentioned. > "i. Approval of the groom who has not reached puberty: The four > Madhabs agree that the father may wed his son, who has not reached > puberty, to the bride, without his permission." I would like to know the sources of this claim, along with the opinion of four madhab regarding this issue. I know the ruling that applies to young girls, but I have yet to come across a fatwa discussing young boys.

Assalamualaikum! I Got engaged in jan 2023 and our parents decided that we’ll wait for 2 years before marriage but because of our studies our parents want us to be settled first so they are going to stretch it more. We don’t want that i’m 24 he’s 25 we both are mature and independent. My question is if my father is okay with the guy but he just wants to delay it, will the nikah be valid if we do it without the acknowledgment of my father or do i need a wali? I have a younger brother who is 20 and if i ask him he will support me. Can he be my wali? We tried persuading our parents but they won’t budge from their decision. Thank you.

I see mixed messages on this. I found one Hadith which seems to infer that consent is required. > حَدَّثَنِي مَالِكٌ، عَنْ نَافِعٍ، أَنَّ عَبْدًا، كَانَ يَقُومُ عَلَى > رَقِيقِ الْخُمُسِ وَأَنَّهُ اسْتَكْرَهَ جَارِيَةً مِنْ ذَلِكَ > الرَّقِيقِ فَوَقَعَ بِهَا فَجَلَدَهُ عُمَرُ بْنُ الْخَطَّابِ وَنَفَاهُ > وَلَمْ يَجْلِدِ الْوَلِيدَةَ لأَنَّهُ اسْتَكْرَهَهَا ‏.‏ > > Malik related to me from Nafi that a slave was in charge of the slaves > in the khumus and he forced a slave-girl among those slaves against > her will and had intercourse with her. Umar ibn al-Khattab had him > flogged and banished him, and he did not flog the slave-girl because > the slave had forced her. > > Muwatta Malik https://sunnah.com/urn/515160 But the Quran and the rest of the Hadiths on this matter do not refer to consent at all. There is no mention of it. Many Muslims will make an argument that because Muhammad said "do no harm" this would apply to sexual relations too and mean consent is required, but this is really stretching it. Others say that because Muhammad ordered a slave freed because she was slapped, therefore consent is required for sex with a female slave. What is the right interpretation?

I don’t have any issues with my dad, i want him to be there and all that but I don’t want his consent to get married, or any man’s. I find it incredibly misogynistic, my consent is the only consent that matters. So when i get married can i do it without my father’s or any man’s consent.

Assalamualaikum, I've deeply fallen in love with a girl of my age, We live far away from each other and meet very rarely. It's been around 2 years and she loves me back and trusts me completely. I fear Allah (SWT) and I want to marry her to validate our relationship however our parents may not allow our nikah now since we're still studying. We hope that Insha'Allah they'll accept us after we have settled in our life. Is it possible for me to marry her without our parents knowing and then remarry her with their consent within 4-5 years Insha'Allah while refraining from sexual activities? If yes what is the valid islamic procedure?

The option of puberty (assuming it can be exercised even if the contract was completed by the father) can only apply when the girl has reached puberty. This means that if the parents were to send her to the husband, he'd be able to have intercourse with her because she's "able to endure it" although the actual process of physical maturation hasn't started yet, neither does she have any sexual desire for intercourse, nor does she understand what intercourse means. All that's required from her is to be plump and fleshy. What does the girl gain in this situation? This is the only time in my life where I feel like I almost completely disagree with a Fiqh ruling. This is way too convenient for the male, and in case she were to exercise her khyar-ul-bulugh at the onset of puberty, she'd have already lost her virginity against her own will. What is the reasoning behind this ruling supported by the most wise of the imams and sheykhs whom I greatly respect? JazakAllah in advance

Is a woman of age 25 allowed in Islam to marry without her father's consent? Father is alive and not abusive.

اسلام عليكم I was reading about slavery in islam. The matter which striked my mind is Why a slave women will give consent for sex to her master who owns her because we know that she became slave due some circumstances(captured in war) not by her own will.

Me and my girlfriend want to get married but our parents will never agree just because I'm a Sunni and she is Shia. We really want to get married and not be involved in haram. If a girl is not a virgin, can nikah be valid without a wali?