Concept of invite only to Hajj and Umrah

When going on Hajj or Umrah, the concept of 'you are invited by Allah' has grown in popularity especially in south asian countries, but speaking of south asian countries, the traditions of innovation is also very strong and binding it to islam which becomes a shrik, but my question is, does Islam has a concept of making someone selected to perform umrah or Hajj? e.g. I couldn't go on same flight as my wife so she performed Umrah with kids and her brother, but when I reached and did umrah, and came back. My spouse said > We weren't destined to do Umrah together, it was written to do with my brother and kids This was hurtful and felt egoistic of her so my question is, 'Do people get invited/selected by Allah to perform umrah or Hajj'? What about those who cannot do it with family, are their fate also written to do it alone?