How does the Catholic Church reconcile Matt 22:39 with Luke 14:26?

In [Luke 14:26](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke%2014%3A26&version=DRA) (Douay-Rheims) we read: > If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. In [Matthew 22:39](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matt+22%3A39&version=DRA) (Douay-Rheims) we read: > And the second is like to this: Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. My understanding is that Jesus did not hate his parents. He did not live like he taught. I have never been told to hate my parents or myself by a spiritual director. They told me the opposite. In Matt 22:39 Jesus said that we should love our neighbours as thyself. But in Luke 14:26 Jesus says that you are supposed to hate yourself. This is confusing to me. I have been told that according to St. John Paul II's Catholic Philosophy, the opposite of love is not hate but use. **How does the Catholic Church reconcile both verses?**