Can Buddhism be interpreted as a quest for the young?

I used to think that the beauty of Buddhism laid within the absence of rules and restrictions. That you won’t be condemned for foing what you think is right. That there is more to see than just “here” and now. But seeing it as a quest also makes me sad that if it doesn’t make sense to my senses and comprehension anymore. I’m the kind of person who cannot obey as wanted blindly, there must always be a reason when it comes to rules rather than spirit. I don’t really stay if this is what is required of me. I don’t need rules, I need companionship, wherever they are or are not. But I’m 35 this year and already I fear the setting sun. I too will haggle more poorly because I am beginning to know that my questing days will become shorter and shorter. I know that I too will need a house of my own, made of rules and rituals and security. How can I say anything against that, though I can’t muzzle my dread? I am beginning to understand why older people don’t change much, though I wish I can be their gentle mare.